A Pig of a Pandemic...

It would seem that the global economic crisis which has been pre-occupying the 24/7 news channels for the past year is over.

They now have a new plaything to scare the wits out of us...Yes, we can forget losing all our money and concentrate on the fact that we're all gonna die of swine flu...

It matters not a jot to the scaremongers in the news industry that more people die from the average seasonal flu outbreak than have died so far with swine flu....Just as long as they can keep us nervously hooked into the latest global scare, facts can take a firm second place.

Yeah, yeah, swine flu virus COULD mutate into a deadlier form that COULD possibly cause million of deaths worldwide...but so could any one of the countless strains of influenza that we're exposed to every year.

So what's the big difference with swine flu?

There's absolutely no difference...

Perhaps it's all in the name, 'swine flu'... Perhaps we sub-consciously believe that a severe dose will leave us looking and acting like pigs...who knows?

Personally, I think it's insulting to our porcine friends, and I hope the piggy community get together and re-name the virus something like, 'Scared Humans Irrational Terror virus"...Yes, S.H.I.T. flu seems quite a fitting alternative...

Come back Dubya......all is forgiven...

Life's no fun since George Bush jr. packed his bags and left Washington back in January.

change we need?
Sure, Obama's first 100 days have been a blast...However, for blog writers like wot I am, he's just too damn perfect. How am I supposed to derive humour from someone who apparently knows what he's talking about?

yes we can...
Things have got so bad that I'm seriously considering starting an online petition to bring the tongue-tied Texan back... Yeah... I know that US leaders are only allowed to serve two terms in office; I also realise that Bush's return would mean depriving some little village in Texas of its idiot....but....surely with enough names we can get the American constitution changed!

no we shouldn't...
On second thoughts, perhaps it would be better to wait a bit longer...I mean, Bill Clinton absolutely breezed it when he first hit the Oval Office....but before too long he discovered the dubious delights of cigar totting totty... and the rest is, as they say... history.

Crawl back into the woodwork...

Anyone old enough to remember the last recession will be familiar with certain ads in the employment pages of newspapers. Well... those ads that promise instant wealth, often working from home, are making a come back.

Typically, they ask for money upfront to cover admin or for registration fees or suchlike....Once you have sent them the money, that is the last you hear of them. Remember, if something sounds too good to be true, it usually is!

avoid at all costs...
Another unwelcome manifestation of the global downturn - anyone who has applied for a job in recent months may have noticed...is the stark reality that it has suddenly become an 'employers market'. This fact has given a new lease of life to the unscrupulous bosses who demand blood in return for paltry salaries. In more prosperous times, these egotistic jerks have problems hiring and retaining good staff... Anyone with any degree of integrity will avoid them at all costs.

However, because compared to a year ago there are now an estimated ten times the applicants for every advertised job, these short-sighted meglomaniacs are well aware of this, so make sure that each applicant "jumps through hoops" at the interview. People looking for honest employment are almost expected to sell their soul in return for a job.

hyper-inflation in the ego department...
The recession has given these creeps a renewed sense of their own importance and ensured that those unlucky enough to be seeking employment are in for a difficult time. Oh well, let's hope the recession sorts itself out fast...and the maggots can once again crawl back into the woodwork.

Footnote: I know this post is not in keeping with the style of the blog...ie, it's not funny....but neither is being scammed or abused by the pondlife that thrive on other people's misfortune!

Child's play for Bush...

Even the slower-witted among us can improve mental agility with a few daily brain teasers, a study suggests.

Source: BBC News website... here

A spokesperson for GW Bush said: "The President prefers the challenge of golf but he's had limited success assembling 30 piece jigsaw puzzles"